Random PoT Episode Rant (67)

Hello! Today's random Prince of Tennis Rant episode is....Episode 67, the second part of the Atobe vs Tezuka match! The opening song is Make You Free and the ending song is White Line (my personal favorite~). Now let's just get on into it! (note: this will consist of a lot of script rewrites...)

NOTE: I love Prince of Tennis, really. It's just fun to make fun of. :)

The match starts off with intense close ups of Atobe, Tezuka, and RYOMA? Well, of course they HAD to do it, he's the PRINCE OF TENNIS! Then there are the tennis shots...more tennis shots...more te- WAIT, Atobe EVIL GLARE

Atobe: *evil glare attack*
Tezuka: ...

Now the series of face shots. First Seigaku (no bias here), then Hyotei, then another glare from Atobe?

Atobe: *evil glare attack again*
Tezuka: ....Yudan sezu ni ikou (the phrase that will never be taken seriously ever again)

Apparently, the match has been going on for an hour and a half. Can you believe having to watch that match? I feel so bad for the watchers! I bet one of them is like, "DUDES, HURRY UP. I have a show to get to that's starting soon!"

Ryoma: Show me what you got, Tezuka-buchou

After more epic tennis shots, this comes along...
Inui: I give up
Everyone: WHAT?
Inui: I meant the data
Everyone: Oh...wait WHAT?
Kaidoh and Momo: Like *insert explanation*....yeah.
Everyone: OOOOOOOH!
Eiji: Geez Inui! Don't be so ambiguious!!!
The moral of the story: What happens in ambiguity, stays in ambiguity. (quote off of a mental floss t-shirt)

Anyway, back to the match!!!
Ryoma: Mada mada dane
Tezuka: Sorry Atobe, but I'm gonna take your spot at the Nationals
Look who's cocky now!
*insert MASS CHARACTER SHOTS*
Wait, wait, wait...what's with all of those character shots and having Sengoku and Canada Sanada say the last two lines before the epic tennis shots?

Saeki: Show me what you got, Atobe
(Ryoma in my head: YOU STOLE MY LINE)
Ryoma in anime: *smirk*

Pause, there is something very important in this episode. The Rikkaidai Red uniforms. Brilliant and beautiful, it's a shame that they were taken out. Let's have a moment of silence...Okay, back to the game

*insert weird Rondo to Destruction animation*
Tezuka: ...*Tezuka Zone* (note: Tezuka apparently has his own gravitational field that he can activate in tennis. Interesting...)
*insert USELESS COMMENTARY here*
Atobe: Don't get too cocky!!! (Thanks Atobe for saying it for me!)
Tezuka: ...*hits ball back*
(Atobe in my head: OMG WHAT? *runs for ball* CRAP ZERO SHIKI SHOT)
Atobe: ...is he SERIOUS?
Let's see a shot of Tezuka's face....Okay, according to this shot, Tezuka could be either serious, non-serious, happy, sad, mad, embarrassed, nervous, calm, or any other emotion. So We can't answer you Atobe, sorry.

FLYING ATOBE! I knew I liked him for something!

Oh no, it's going in slow motion! Could it be time?
BAM! Red screen of PAIN!
Everyone within a 5 mile radius of court: GASPEH.
Tezuka: ...*clutches shoulder*
Wait a minute! Wasn't it supposed to be his elbow? (correct me if I'm wrong folks)
Continuing...(with extra drama)
Everyone: OMG D8
Seigaku: *runs towards their precious captain*
Tezuka: GO AWAY
Everyone: GASPEH *faints a little*
Atobe: gr....*insulted*
Tezuka: ...*looks like he's gonna continue*
Everyone: DON'T DO IT!
Tezuka: ...*flexes arm*
Everyone: DON'T DO IT!!!!
*Oishi and Tezuka staredown*
Oishi: blah blah blah (something about Yamato Tamato)
*cheesy flashback, inspirational quotes from the Seigaku team with their jersey flowing in the invisible wind...*
*second Oishi Tezuka staredown*
Oishi: You should do it.
Everyone: WAIT WHAT???? *faints a little more*
Ryoma: *smirk*
(note: some of the above might have been paraphrased)

TAKA! Let's talk about Taka. He is awesome and he doesn't get enough love. TAKA IS FREAKING AWESOME PEOPLE SO GIVE HIM MORE LOVE!
Taka: *waves flag* FIGHT!! FIGHT!! SEIGAKU!
Ryuzaki: Um...you just got back from the hospital...
Taka: *ignores and continues* (this is why he is awesome)

Ryoma then goes and warms up ('cause he totally has faith in his buchou...*rolls eyes*) Momo goes too (because he also has complete faith in their buchou....*rolls eyes*)

Ryuzaki: How come we have all stubborn people in the club? They all go for the spur of the moment...
Ryoma: You're praising me too much :) *walks away*

Did anyone else notice that Tezuka has a white racket and that Atobe's racket sorta matches his hair, except bluer? Weird...(you'd expect black from this series but whatever)

The rest of the episode goes a bit like this...
EPIC TENNIS
EPIC MEANINGFUL NOD FOR WARMING UP
EPIC SKY TRANSITION
EPIC TENNIS
EPIC TEZUKA GLASSES GLARE *ding*
EPIC TENNIS
MORE TAKA LOVE
Taka: Don't give up! ;u;
EPIC RED SCREEN
Atobe: Ah, you're in pain
EPIC BUTT SHOT ...wait what?
EPIC TENNIS
EPIC TRANSLATION FAIL (Sanada: Return aces twice?)
EPIC EMPHESIS ON TEZUKA LOSING
EPIC EMPHESIS ON ATOBE WINNING
Atobe: Why are you so determined? Who would have known that you had such a reckless side? *insert more rambling about Tezuka*
EPIC TENNIS BALL BLOCKING THE SUN
EPIC TENNIS BALL HEADING TOWARDS TEZUKA'S FACE
Tezuka: ...*staredown*
EPIC LAST SHOT OF RYOMA ('cause he's the PRINCE OF TENNIS)

And...scene!

Join me next time on a Random PoT Episode Rant! :)